My fellow religious figures, it is with great and sincere sorrow that I write this.
As I am sure you have all noticed, I failed to update our beloved blog yesterday and therefore failed each of you. I come here today to beg for your forgiveness and ask that you will overlook my epic failure.
The reason I was unable to post yesterday is because I, Jesus, have a rather large family. I’m sure this does not come as much of a surprise to you, seeing as my father is kind of everyone else’s father as well. He gets around.
The thing about having a large family is that they like to visit from time to time, which means that you must spend every waking moment with them. As an added bonus, my family greatly enjoys overlooking my prior commitments to have large parties. As a matter of fact, there is a large party going on in my kitchen as I type this. I am also surrounded by a few of my cousins. I hope you understand how awkward this is. Please forgive my lack of wit and hilarity, I am in quite an unsettled mental state. Now my cousin needs to use my computer. I promise to be back full swing next week.
This whole story, my brothers and sisters, is the reason birth control is your friend. As you were.
